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- Playing the closing ceremony of the VOICES (Victims of Incest Can Emerge Survivors) conference in Newark, New Jersey. At the conference we received an endorsement from an atheist author who was an expert in the field because she thought the healing message of the tape was so strong. After the conference was over a young woman came up to me and said, 'People have been telling me I was an innocent child all my life but I never believed it until I heard you sing it today.'
- After a performance of our play in Rolling Hills, California a lady told me that she had been using drugs to fall asleep for 20 years. Then she held up our tape. 'Now, I listen to this instead.'
- We received a call from a lady in Chicago, Illinois who told us that she had been planning to commit suicide that day but our tape had stopped her.
- A therapist in Fullerton, California brought a client who had never been able to open up about her incest to one of our presentations. 'Before your play I could never get her to cry about her incest. Now she can't stop crying and she's letting the pain out.'
- And in perhaps the most startling development, we were asked to perform the stage play for twenty schools in the metropolitan Los Angeles school district. The lady in charge of bringing outside presentations to the children flew in the face of the separation of church and state by deeming the value of our project too important to pass up. It is significant to note this unreserved show of support came from a lady who was Jewish even though our project was blatantly Christian.
- We performed the play for audiences as small as 10 and as large as 1,000. It was performed at colleges, churches, hospitals, and in theaters over a period of about 3 years.
JOURNEY TO THE MUSIC FOR THE SOUL
One day in the late 1980's I was listening to the radio. My first pop single was in rotation on a Los Angeles radio station and I was anxiously waiting to hear it for the first time. Then it came on and after it was over I found myself thinking of the old Peggy Lee song Is That All There Is? I had spent 15 years trying to achieve something and now that I had all I could think of was that it didn't make any difference in the world at all. This was a derivative piece of dance drivel that could have been written by anybody. There was nothing of me in it.
Late that night I went to our little wooden church that had a 24-hour open door policy. I sat there and asked God to send me something meaningful to do with my life. I knew that He hadn't given me the gift of music to write jingles, sitcom themes, and dance tunes. There had to be something more. I even told Him I would quit music altogether if He wanted me to do something else.
Less than ten days later I heard from a man named Stephen Breithaupt who had heard me sing in church a few times. He told me that he had just licensed the rights to a book on child sexual abuse written by two Christian authors. He wanted to do a musical stage play and album based on the material. 'I think you're the guy who's supposed to write the songs,' he said. And so I met with him.
Upon seeing the book I knew instantly that I had to do the project even though I didn't know anything about the issue. I had prayed for something that would make a difference and this is what He had sent. I knelt and asked God to help me write the songs because I knew the need was real and I wanted the songs to say what He would have them say.
After finishing the songs I took them to a therapist that I knew and asked her to review them because I wanted to make sure they were appropriate. She kept them over the weekend and when I returned on Monday to pick them up she said to me, 'I hope you won't mind but I used your songs with a client over the weekend.' My prayers had been answered.
The little project with the funny name I Can't Talk About It changed my life. After experi-encing faith as part of my work I could never look at my career in the same way again. It was then that I fashioned my personal mission statement that is: To proclaim a renewing, healing, and compassionate Christ to the world through music.
What kind of response did I Can't Talk About It generate?
Since then it has been amazing the way that God has honored my mission statement with opportunities to share His compassion with others. In 1991 I was asked by Lynne McCleery of Score Productions to write a theme song for an AIDS fundraiser that she was putting together. The song I wrote, We're All In This Together, was recorded by Patti Austin on GRP records and also released as the title track for a special multi-artist album to raise money for AIDS research. The first week after relocating to Nashville I walked into Tower Records to discover that it was We're All In This Together month! After many live performances and several network TV broadcasts, the highlight for me was when Austin sang the song live in front of the Washington Monument to an audience of 250,000 during the annual Names Quilt Ceremony in Washington, D.C. Not coincidentally, it was on the strength of this song that I was offered my first Christian music publishing deal at Starsong in June of 1993.
It was in that same summer that I wrote a song with Ty Lacy called Not Too Far From Here. Initially the song was recorded by Kim Boyce in 1994 and went to #1 on the CCM chart after being released as a single. But it was in spring of 1995 that the song stunned me.
After first hearing the news of the bombing of the Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City I couldn't pray. Though I felt deeply, especially for those who had lost their children in the day care center, I literally felt I had no words. A few nights later the annual Dove Awards took place in Nashville and I went to the obligatory after-party for EMI staff, artists, and songwriters. When a limo arrived bearing two of Contemporary Christian music's more prominent artists a photographer bodily shoved me out of the way to get a clearer view. I thought to myself "What am I doing here? I'm going home to my family."
The next morning I had just come back from taking my mother-in-law to the airport and as I pulled in the driveway my six year old daughter came running out saying, 'Daddy, daddy! Your song is on television!' I wondered to myself what terrible re-run from my TV scoring days was on when I walked in to find my wife on the den sofa, tears streaming down her cheeks. On Good Morning America a little 8-year old girl was singing Not Too Far From Here. Interspersed with live shots of her singing were video clips of the rescue efforts at the bombsite and clips of the victim's memorial service. It was as if in that moment God said to me, "This is what you're doing here. You do have words for these people," and I knew in my heart that that was worth a hundred Dove Awards stacked on top of each other and then some. I was humbled beyond belief that God would allow my song to be used to comfort others in this unspeakably tragic time.
After that, it was as if the song took on a life of it's own. Kim Boyce called me to tell me about a man who had heard the song on his car radio that had pulled over to the side of the road in tears to accept Christ. She told me, "My whole career was about getting to the moment when I could sing that song." In 1996 I heard from a missionary family that was using it in the jungles of Brazil. In 1998 Michael Crawford, who had heard little Mikaila's version decided to record it on an album of spiritual songs, which led to further exposure. In 2000 I heard from Graham Webb, the chairman of England's National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children who told me that the song and had been performed with vocal and harp at Leeds Castle for one of their events and that their television campaign featured the song. As of now there are at least twenty-five recorded versions of Not Too Far From Here of which I'm aware.
In 1995 my wife was four months pregnant when we discovered that the child she was carrying would be born with Spina Bifida. As a way to process this information and as a gift to my unborn son I wrote a song called Whole In The Sight of God. Author and artist Joni Erickson Tada, a quadriplegic, subsequently asked permission to sing the song at her conferences for handicapped kids and their families.
In September of 1997 my wife's father passed away. I wanted to find something to comfort her and was amazed to find no music available to help those dealing with grief. As she was flying back to Virginia for her father's funeral she looked out the airplane window and said she could imagine her father, free, dancing in the clouds. Out of this circumstance Dancing With Angels was created. Counselors, pastors, and funeral homes have used this album to help those coping with loss. A beautiful line of sympathy cards has been developed to accompany the music.
My mission statement has continued to drive the content of my career and I have heard through recording artists from people all over the country about how the songs have touched lives; All of My Hope comforting a young woman who's aunt was dying of brain cancer, More Like A Whisper encouraging a father with two special needs children, Every Single Tear being played over and over by a mother of 9 as she fought a losing battle with a terminal disease...God has been so faithful in answering my request to make the work matter.
In 1999 I was at the Ryman auditorium for a concert during Gospel Music Association week. Clay Crosse, BeBe Winans, and Bob Carlisle debuted a song I had co-written with Clay entitled I Will Follow Christ. Even before the song was over the crowd was on their feet screaming and applauding. I sat in the middle of all of it and remember saying quietly to myself, "wow." The next morning was the Columbine tragedy. I Will Follow Christ went on to win the Dove Award for Inspirational Song of the Year in 2000. "So in other words," I said to a friend, "Cassie Bernall gets shot for saying she will follow Christ and I get thousands of dollars, the approval of a cheering crowd, and a gold statuette for my piano." That series of events had a lot to do with pushing me further towards the creation of this ministry. God had been guiding my steps and whispering in my ear ever since that night in the little wooden church. Finally, in December 2000 I made the decision to create Music for the Soul.
I believe firmly and passionately that music is a gift from God and has the power to speak healing straight to people's hearts where words alone can often fail. I truly believe that there are severely hurting people among us who may not be reached any other way but by hearing the message of Christ's renewing love through the gentle touch of music. It is the vision of Music for the Soul to equip Christian counselors and pastors with a series of records that speak to every major issue facing our society today so that no matter what problem may walk through the door on any given day there is musical resource available to help. I believe the path I have traveled has uniquely prepared me for this endeavor and I ask for your prayers and support.
Steve Siler
Founder
Music for the Soul